and may I introduce……

Posted by Steve on March 9th, 2009 filed in Life, rant
1 Comment »

Rowan Elizabeth!

Oh. My. Gosh.

The last few days have been really crazy, but really awesome.  I’ll cut to the chase.  My sister delivered a beautiful, healthy baby girl, Rowan Elizabeth Lemberger on 3/5/09 at around 4:30am. THAT, my friends, is all we really need to know… right?

But you want more information, of course, so I shall divulge.

Sara was set to be induced on Thursday, but on Wednesday night, she starting having contractions and then all of a sudden, her water broke.  We had planned on driving over on Thursday, casually, since the inductions usually transpire over a period of hours.  Apparently, Rowan had something else in mind.

Delara and I got the call at about 3:15am that she was 6cm, and they were putting in an epidural.  I said, “OK, cool… epidural in, that’ll slow things down a bit, and we can probably get there in time. ” It’s about 2 hours from our home base to Columbia, at least ‘as the Steve drives’, so I’m thinking we’re good to go.

Not so much.  Sara gets her epidural, and has like TWO pushes, and Rowan’s head is just coming out.  The nurses were like “ok, WAIT, the doctor isn’t even here!”.  Yeah, Rowan was just ready to arrive.  And so she did.

Quickly.  Beautifully.  And we just missed it.

We were steaming East from Kansas City in the Civic, but Rowan’s timetable for arrival apparently was not what the standard timing is for deliveries, epidurals, pushing, and all that jazz.  She was just like….. Hey world, guess what?  Here I am!

So, so awesome.

I am sad that we weren’t there at the moment she arrived, but we got there shortly thereafter, and I got to do my pediatrician stuff - you know, check her out, listen to her heart, lungs, all that stuff that I paid $150,000 to learn how to do so well. [smile]  It was so, so, amazing to be there, examining my little niece.  I mean, I’ve done this with hundreds and probably thousands of babies before, if you go all the way back to med school and my training.  But this was my little niece, and here she was!  It was so amazing, and so special, and I am so grateful that I was able to be there and share this with my sister and her husband, and my wife.

Rowan’s ‘real’ doctor arrived a few hours later to check her out, in the morning, who happened to be Holly Bondurant, who was one of my Chief Residents during pediatric residency, and so it was really awesome that SHE was there to be my sister’s baby doctor, and that I got to see her again and reconnect.

I am just totally jazzed.  This is unreal.  Rowan is here, I get to be a part of it with Delara, and in the process I’m seeing and reconnecting with some of my old friends from residency at Mizzou.  Sara’s pediatrician is Paula Steubben, who was also my chief, and she is also a fantastic person and pediatrician.  It was just really wonderful and incredible for me.

But this isn’t at all about me.

It’s about baby Rowan, who now has graced the Earth with her presence, and now has a big brother - Bacchus - who at just over 2, doesn’t quite know what to think, or expect, and yet he already loves her.  To experience him seeing his baby sister Rowan, who Sara and Drew have been talking about for months, real live, in person, for the first time - and seeing what that was like for him - was just incredible.  You can’t put a pricetag on this stuff, baby.

My heart has been so full in the last few days that it is really very hard to describe.

Sara is an amazing mom, Drew is an amazing dad, Bacchus is a light of sunshine that shines so brightly and now, we have baby Rowan to add to the picture.  So great.

For me, it really brought a lot of personal ‘heart tugs’ because Sara and I are just 2 years apart, so I am watching what it must have been like for me when Sara came home from the hospital - through the eyes of Bacchus seeing his baby sister Rowan, and I have to tell you, it just pretty much has rocked my world.

Good stuff, my friends.

Oh, Delara and I also had the pleasure of taking Bacchus for his 2nd haircut ever.  This one actually went WAAAAY better than haircut #1. 

More will be revealed, but for now, I shall leave you with some pictures and videos of the last few days.  Please enjoy.

I AM the baby whisperer

Posted by Steve on February 14th, 2009 filed in Family, Life
4 Comments »

This is TOO funny not to blog.

I was on my way to a meeting this afternoon, and called my sister (just before 2pm) to say hello, and she informed me that she was doing ‘ok’, but that Bacchus was refusing to take a nap - neither she nor Drew had been able to get him to lie down to go to sleep.

Just for fun (because it always IS fun to talk to him on the phone), I said, “lemme talk to him!”

So, Bacchus gets on the phone, and says, “Hi TeTe….  where Wa-Wa? (Delara)?”

I told him that she wasn’t there, but would he take a nap for me?

Bacchus: “OK.”

Me: “Really?  You’ll take a nap for uncle Te-Te?”

Bacchus: “Sure.”

And he gets off the phone, and I go to my meeting.

Well, Sara called my parents minutes later to relay the story, and the fact that when he hung up the phone with me, proceeded to walk right into his room, lie down, and take a nap.  He’s still sleeping, 2 hours later.

I freaking rock!!!!! hehehe

OK, OK, he probably was just ready for a nap, anyway… but still.  We’re all laughing about it.

So, on that note…..  Happy Valentine’s Day to everyone, and… go take a nap!

I have been enterobacteria-ified. And, I’m an idiot.

Posted by Steve on February 13th, 2009 filed in Life, rant
1 Comment »

OK, so, over the last few days, while on the way to the hospital to visit with my uncle, I have a couple of times, grabbed a Clif bar to curb my appetite, and haven’t even thought about what kind it was.

You can guess what is coming.  Last night, out of the blue, I’m driving along when all of a sudden, I felt like I had just been given a freaking GI distress pill.  I won’t go into details, but last night sucked.

And yes, the Clif bar that I had was on the recall list, which means I just salmonella-ified myself.

I actually feel a bit better today - I have this feeling of unrest in my stomach, but otherwise, things are happening pretty much as they are supposed to happen (I am trying to be vague here for the faint of heart).

So, a little PSA for everyone.  PLEASE, DO NOT EAT ANYTHING WITH PEANUT-STUFF IN IT!

It sucks.

Jesus, maybe I don’t deserve my medical license back after all.  Oy vey.

Well, there’s good news, and there’s bad news.

Posted by Steve on February 13th, 2009 filed in Family, Life
2 Comments »

First, the bad news.

My uncle Bob has been readmitted to KU Med Center in Kansas City for 2 new brain lesions (metastatic brain tumors) which were causing some speech and other CNS impairment, secondary to cerebral edema and some midline shift (for you lay people out there, swelling in the brain).  Those symptoms have largely resolved following high dose dexamethasone (steroid), and yesterday, he embarked on a 2nd round of radiation therapy to the brain.  He is having 2 modalities - whole-brain radiation, which will be followed by SRS (sterotactic radiosurgery), which is a high-dose, targeted radiation for the 2 new discrete brain lesions.  He will also be beginning a new round of oral and intravenous chemotherapies, some of which will have to be held until the radiation therapy has completed.

So, the big picture…..  not great news, although it’s good that he is feeling better with the dexamethasone treatments.  However, these only help with the inflammation and swelling of the brain - they do nothing to ameliorate or treat the actual tumors themselves.

He has successfully gotten through his nephrectomy, which was 3 weeks ago at MD Anderson in Houston, although part of his pre-surgical testing at that time revealed 2 new lung lesions that were not responsive to the chemotherapy he had been taking.

Needless to say, Bob needs all of our prayers right now.

On brighter news….  Robbie’s fundraiser last weekend was an amazing success.  The Trivia Night wound up raising over $17,000 for Tammy and Bob, which will go a long way to help them make ends meet while he continues on his long road of treatment.  At this point, he is in week 1 of his remaining 146 weeks.  Yes, you read that correctly.  One hundred and forty six more weeks of treatment.  A very long road, indeed.

And on to some good news for me (I think).  It appears that I may be ever closer to having my medical license in TN reinstated.  I have just sent the last of the required paperwork, as well as the reinstatement fee, so now the waiting continues, but all signs are very positive at this point.  Please keep praying for good results here, too!

Sister Sara is having some early/false labor contractions, but is otherwise doing well, and very watermelon-like.  We all await Rowan Elizabeth’s arrival in the coming weeks!

That’s all for now.

Obama fever…

Posted by Steve on January 23rd, 2009 filed in Life
2 Comments »

Family updates, first…   My uncle Bob is out of surgery in Houston (TX) at MD Anderson, having undergone a nephrectomy (removal of the kidney) and tumor removal.  The word is that there was no local spread of tumor in the abdomen (we already know it has spread to his lungs and brain), and that the removal went as well as can be expected.  Yay for Bob - he has had a really tough road over the last 6 months, including his cancer diagnosis, his father’s passing, and just a month ago, his truck and lots of his tools being stolen.  Seriously, his frakkin truck was like “ok, what is up with this???”.  Bob, you deserve some good news, and good recovery - my prayers and those of many are with you.

My aunt Elizabeth is at home - and staying there, for a change - and doing better, and I’m very grateful for that.  She has also had a long, long road with bladder cancer, and I really cannot fathom how much she’s had to go through.  My uncle has been there every step of the way, and well, they both need a rest, too.  It’d be nice to have some time at home to just… be.  I hope they get that.

Next comes my nephew Robbie (OK, he’s my cousin Tammy’s kiddo, so I know he’s not really my nephew, but I don’t care - he’s a nephew to me!).  He is marching through his treatments at St. Jude’s, and is being a trooper.  Having been around and worked with many kiddos going through cancer treatments, it never ceases to amaze me at the power and strength that children have, and Robbie is certainly no exception.  That his family - our family - continues the march with him is of course not a surprise, but it is a blessing, as all of the supportive people that Tammy and Bob have there in St. Louis continue to be.  Robbie’s road is a long one, and he’s only a little way down it thus far.  That really sucks.

Wow, it’s like I’m doing a cancer update here.  Maybe that’s what my blog needs to be - family cancer update.  No, it doesn’t.  But it does sometimes feel like that.  There are some other good things happening, so I’ll share those.

My interview in VA went very, very well.  I very much liked this position, the people I met, would work with and who would work for me, and yeah - I’d like to have this job.  We’ll see if they feel the same way.  I hope they do.  And, some good news about my medical licensure, as a letter came today outlining what I need to do to reinstate that in TN.  I’ll complete those steps this weekend, notarize it on Monday, and send off to TN, and then see what needs to be done next.  Regardless of what happens with the VA gig, I need to finish the process with my TN licensure, and have that blight removed from my background check once and for all.  Oh what problem it has caused.

So, things are pretty good here.  Delara and I are doing well, and our relationship seems to have turned a positive page in the last couple of weeks, too.  I am very glad about that, and very glad that some positive signs seem to be sparking up about what may be coming for us.  Stay tuned to see what else may be!

OK, I cannot neglect to talk about the pure joy I feel about our new President, and what he is already doing in office.  Overturning and reversing so much of the terrible policies that have been done in the last 8 years, and the inauguration itself?  Well, that was amazing.  I wasn’t able to watch it live, as I was doing my interview at the time, although I WAS able to see the oath at noon on Tuesday.  Where I was interviewing, the office had TV’s set up, and everyone was gathered to watch - and applause broke out when he was sworn in (seriously, Chief Justice - 35 words, don’t you think you could memorize those and not screw them up for our new President????? but anyway…).

It was very jubilant in the office, and that gave me a very good feeling about the organization with whom I could be working.  It was a really special moment, and although I’m sad I was not there, I was most definitely there in spirit.

On the way to my interview, I connected through Charlotte (on the way to Richmond), and I sat next to a young black boy, probably 10 or 11, and we began chatting with one another.  HE was going with his parents to attend the inauguration, from Miami, and he seemed excited.  He was really cute, and seemed like a great kid.  And the awesome thing is, this is his reality as a 10 year old.  He’ll be able to tell his children, and his children’s children about the day, and that he was there.  Amazing.  Good for him, and good for his parents.  He was most worried about how cold he was going to be, having grown up in Miami.  Umm, yeah, you have NO idea, dude, what cold is like then!  I bet his parents kept him warm, and I bet it was amazing.

OK, that’s about it for now.  I have a lot to say about what we are learning about what Bush/Cheney did during their 8 years, and how hard it is going to be to ‘un-do’ those things, but I shall leave that for another blog [rant].

Happy Birthday, Grayson!

Posted by Steve on January 13th, 2009 filed in Life
1 Comment »

And hey!  Grayson turns 3 today, sadly in Illinois, which is not where I am at the moment.  It would be really cool to pick him up and turn him upside down a few times right about now.  And, to hear all of the things that I’m sure he is saying in the 2 short months since I’ve last seen him.

So Happy Birthday, little dude!!

up, up and away…..

Posted by Steve on January 13th, 2009 filed in Life
1 Comment »

Today (and this week) have been really productive.  I have an interview lined up next week in Virginia, and an incredible-sounding job that is open in Boston that I would love to have, so it seems as if things may be shaping up.

I definitely feel good, and positive, and that I am moving in the right direction.  And that Obama is coming to power in the coming days is certainly no small thing!

Let’s go, 2009 - keep it coming!

Welcome 2009

Posted by Steve on January 5th, 2009 filed in Life
3 Comments »

Where to begin….   well, the job that looked so promising last month did not come to fruition.  The job offer was rescinded because of a blight on my background check - my ‘record’.  This stems from the TN Medical Board order from 2005, during which time my medical license was suspended for 3 months.  Apparently, I was supposed to have applied to have the suspension ‘lifted’ - although I was never told this by anyone.  If only I had known.  So, in 2006, when my license expired, it expired with the ’suspended’ status, and so now this shows up on a background check as a ‘healthcare sanction’.

Lots of feelings about this, as you can imagine.  At first, I was really hurt, sad, angry…  why is this STILL happening after 4 years of being clean and sober?  But alas, it is as they say in the rooms of AA, “when you stop the locomotive, the rest of the train keeps coming - and it may take a while to get there.”  Or something like that.

The bottom line is…  I still have some things I still need to walk through before I can get this cleared up.  After much investigation and examination, it appears that I have to re-instate my license in TN to remove this suspension, and ‘blight’ - even though at this point, I have no intention of practicing medicine.

It has been a frustrating process.  I have had 2 - yes, two - companies give me job offers, and in fact, they really wanted me to join them, only to have this background check derail the process.  Both were great jobs, and both would have really been a terrific step for my career.

I can say this has taken a toll on me, and on my marriage.  I have not always been at my best.  I have not always been the best man I can be during this process.  Nor have I always been the best husband I can be.  Certainly continuing to be clean and sober has been a blessing, and continues to be a blessing.  But, as I’ve often said, my recovery is about more than just not using drugs or alcohol.  It’s about life, and about living life fully.  I haven’t done as good a job of that as I have wanted to do.

As I look ahead to 2009, I have a lot of hope that things will change, and for the better.  I hope I can be better in my recovery, better in my marriage, and better as a person.  I have a lot to offer this world, and I’m ready to step into whatever that looks like.

And I do have a lot of gratitude.  Gratitude to my parents for so lovingly letting Delara and I stay with them through this process.  Gratitude for my wife, Delara, with whom things have not been perfect - yet I know she is still the one for me.  Gratitude for my recovery, and for the opportunity to start life anew, as I did in 2004.  Gratitude for our new President, and what positive change he may bring to our nation. Gratitude for my family, even as several family members fight their own battles with cancer and disease.  And gratitude for a relationship with God, as I understand Him - an imperfect, evolving relationship, but one that gives me strength and hope.

Yes, I have much hope for what lies ahead in 2009.  I have a clear picture of what I need to do, but what fruit that may bear is a mystery.  This is as God wants it, and I look forward to finding out what lies ahead.

Crossing Boundaries

Posted by Steve on December 1st, 2008 filed in Family, Life
1 Comment »

Well, we are back from our travels to Chicago and Oregon, IL.  Delara and I flew to Chicago a week ago Wednesday, and had a great visit with her mom.  Then, that Friday, I had another interview, which went very, very well.  I was told I would hear something the week after Thanksgiving; however, I was called the day before Thanksgiving with a job offer.  Woo hoo!!  I have decided to accept the offer, so am going through the initial hire process this week.  This will be a travel position, so Delara and I can live where we want to live, but because most of my travel will be in the Midwest, we are strongly considering staying in the Midwest.  Time will tell - we’re not in a hurry to make a decision, most likely after the holidays.

Our visit in Oregon with my sister Jessi, brother-in-law Seth and nephew Grayson went well.  We went the week before Thanksgiving to help Jessi setup her museum in Byron, Illinois, for the grand opening of their Smithsonian exhibit, called Between Fences.  The opening was Saturday evening, and it went great.  Jessi did a marvelous job with the exhibit, as well as their new local exhibit called Crossing Boundaries.

We were thrilled to be able to spend some time with Amelia, as well as Mina, Alan and Raffi - a good time was had by all!  Please refer to Delara’s flickr pictures for more evidence of the fun.  Also as a PS, for those looking for Italy pictures, Delara’s flickr is the place to go - she has a comprehensive collection posted.

That’s all for now…….  I am very thankful to have new employment very soon.

PS  Check out this hilarious video of Grayson - I still can’t stop laughing!

<Disclaimer: No children were injured in the filming of this video>

Robbie…

Posted by Steve on November 17th, 2008 filed in Family
2 Comments »

As most of you know, my cousin Tammy’s little man, Robbie, is in Memphis at St. Jude’s Hospital, undergoing his first round (the induction phase) of chemotherapy for a very rare, very aggressive cancer.  He has a long road ahead of him, but he is a tough little guy - and he has a tough mom and dad, too.

The family has rallied behind them, and we are trying to help make everything happen for them as we can.

You can follow Robbie’s progress at the following website, as well as leave message for Robbie and family.  We are working on a fundraiser or two, and I will let everyone know the details of those as they become available.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/robbiedutton

It’s been a tough couple of months for my family, to be sure.